I recently retired from design to become a full time caregiver for my elderly mother. It has been the roller coaster ride of all time. When I sent my e-Blast out about my retirement, I was over-whelmed by the compassion and support from so many others who have experienced being care givers, who have said how challenging and rewarding it is all at the same time.
Mom is napping at the moment and I am standing guard to prevent the constant interruptions that deprive her of sleep and cause her decline. I'd like to share a few thoughts about the experience. I am calling this short short essay "Old Farts and Toddlers"
Let's face it. Let's tell it like it is. There's a lot of similarities between old folks and babies. I am learning this the hard way - by being my (almost 90 year old) mother's caregiver in assisted living and skilled nursing facilities. Poor things - unable to eat regular food, reduced to eating puréed mush. Can't tell when they have to - or already did - pee or poop; so surprise! Thank goodness for Depends. Feet and hands don't cooperate, don't move when and where they want them to go. And, oh the mind! What was that word for that object? It's on the tip of my . . . What's that word for that thing in my . . . What's the word for . . .
Fortunately, it has only been a few years since my grandchildren were babies/toddlers - learning how to get around in their bodies, figuring out how to string words together in their ever growing vocabulary, graduating from baby food to finger foods into quite sophisticated palettes. Even though Mom's body is declining in many ways, I adhere to the concept that as some brain cells die from Shy Drager's Syndrome, other cells can connect those brain cells to reprogram and take over old tasks. (for an easy-to-understand demonstration of this concept, watch the movie "What the Bleep.")
I mean no disrespect to Mom and all old folks - let's face it, I am on the same road - but if there is one thing I know for sure it is that I have to keep a sense of humor. There are so many challenges in assisted living and skilled nursing facilities that are maddening, absolutely freaking maddening. Sometimes I feel as if I am in a movie combo of "One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest" meets "Cool Hand Luke." So here I am advocating for better treatment for Mom, learning daily lessons and laughing with her every chance we get.
Maybe I am not done with design after all because I am seeing the need for objects that address the needs of elders. Maybe "necessity is the mother of invention." Who knows where I will go with that?
Gotta go, baby - I mean, Mom - is waking up from her nap.
